If I Could Do It All Over Again

I know that after we separated ways before,
We are mad at each other,
Blaming each other for those mistakes,
Mistakes we can avoid if we’ve listen,
Listen to each other clearly…

Things got so mess up that time.
I thought I’ve hated you for causing me pain.
But that’s not I really feel,
I was blinded by my anger and close mindedness,
That I didn’t see we are fighting already…

We fight as if there is no end on it,
I’ve got so furious at you for no reason at all,
Though that’s not what I really felt,
I just blinded myself so I wouldn’t feel anything,
And that blindness causes me to leave you…

And deep inside my heart is aching,
And I did cry and those tears,
But it cannot erase my yearning for you.
I know that your love walked away from you,
And my heart was lost when you left…

But I realize that I cannot turn back the time,
And go back to where we first started,
I know you did love me the way I did,
But we both know that we can’t rewind it,
And put things back the way it used to be…

And I’m not sure if we can treat each other,
As good friends because things aren’t the same,
And you might be in doubt about it,
But I just want to say that,
I’m sincere about making things better this time…

If only if I could do it all over again.
Maybe things didn’t turn up this way,
And we might be still together until now.
I just feel that I’m not used that,
You’re not here in my life…

My Heart Is So Cold

I know I treated you badly before,
As if you’re the worst person I’ve known,
And I know that’s not right,
Because when the time you need the most,
I treated you the way that is unexplainable…

The fact that I’m so hurt before,
Was the main factor why I acted that way?
Admittedly, yes it was the main reason,
And I know I shouldn’t been like to you.
It’s rather a foolish move for me…

I shouted at you,
Get so mad for no valid reason,
I didn’t realize I was the one,
Who’ve been hurting you that time,
And you distance yourself away from me…

And that truth stayed with me,
And I feel so bad about it,
Holding inside the guilt I have,
And trying not to think about it,
My heart is so cold…

And the time had come,
That I’ve talk to you and apologize,
For that irreversible mistake to you,
I don’t know if you’ve forgiven me,
But I feel my heart was so cold…

I finally realize that I did wrong,
I let my pride on the way,
And I’ve almost lose you along the way.
And I’m really sorry about that,
I want to put the painful memories to rest…

But I’m hoping we will be real okay,
And finally had that closure,
So that the war be started would finally cease,
And so that we can go on,
And hopefully, be good friends in the end…

First Love

As I was reminiscing about my past,
I remember the very first time,
That heart falls for someone that deep,
And it’s a kind of feeling that is exciting,
And yet confusing for me that time…

We are just simple friends,
But always together and talking to each other,
And our friendships grows deeper,
And somehow we are inseparable,
Until that moment that I didn’t foresee came…

I felt my heart was beating a different beat,
And my mind singing a different song,
And it seems I’m feel awkward towards my friend,
And I don’t understand what’s going on,
I’m really fond of my friend that time…

Until I finally understand why I felt that way,
And what makes me feel awkward,
I just thought, maybe, just maybe,
I was already falling for my dear friend,
And it just hit me that very moment…

Eventually I did confess that to my friend,
And it was a real shock for both of us,
My friend didn’t reject me after I confess,
Thus, our friendship grows much deeper,
And I realize, that’s my very first love…

LIFE IS...

Life is full of hardships,
Full of complicated things,
And unpredictable events,
That will test us from time to time,
So to see if what we are made of…

We face some things that test our patience,
That test of how far we could go,
And how deep our understanding is,
And it’s not easy to face those things,
It is because some of us are already giving up…

Life is not a bed of roses,
Life is not all about happy memories,
But some downfalls that we have to face,
We become much stronger,
As we overcome what life had thrown to us…?

We become much harder and sturdier,
As we are able to deal with problems,
And deal with it with patience,
Hardships that are meant to be given to us,
Are the things we had to face in life…

Memories

There are days that all I can think,
That keeps me adrift,
Were the memories you left to me,
The past that was already engraved into my heart,
The heart that had once become your sanctuary…

There were times that I find myself,
Wondering about everything in the past,
And what had gone wrong and we end this way,
We lead our separate ways because that’s for the best,
And yet I still have glimpses of you in my mind…

It came back to me like rushing water,
And even if I don’t want to think about it,
I can’t help but linger in the past,
And I secretly am smiling when thinking of the good times.
But all of that just become memories…

You left me without telling the truth to me,
You just left the memories we had,
The memories of our past,
And though we are really apart now,
Your memories will always be with me…

You’re someone that I didn’t forget so easily,
Your memories are left with me,
And it will be with me for the rest of my life,
Constantly reminding me,
That once you’ve been a part of me…

Incomplete

I just felt in my being that something was missing,
I just feel that I feel incomplete,
And sometimes I’m longing for that something,
That might complete me.
And whatever is missing in me…

Even though it seems I had almost everything,
I still feel lonely and sad,
It’s not that I’m discontented,
It’s just that the one I’m searching,
Is not a material thing, but something called love…?

Maybe I did fall a lot of times before,
And always thought I finally found it,
But in the end, it wasn’t the one,
And my heart is yearning,
Wanting to finally find that love…

I always end up in the dust,
Always getting hurt because of love,
But I didn’t stop trying over and over again,
Because I’m still searching for it,
So this incompleteness of me would be gone…

Maybe in the right time,
I would finally find that love,
That love the would make me whole,
And would take away my incompleteness,
Just in the nick of time, I guess…

Last Farewell

I bid my last farewell to that very special person to me,
Because I had no choice that time but to let go,
Even though it hurts me so much,
I have to let go because destiny didn’t favor us,
And I have to move on and go on with my life…

That last farewell was not easy,
I can’t look straight in the eyes,
And I’m preventing myself from crying,
Because I don’t want to show that I’m hurt,
So I pretend that I’m going to be fine…

But reality hurts, it really does,
It strike me straight to my heart,
Constantly reminding me,
Of the time I did let go of you,
The time that we supposed to be okay…

My heart was crushed because of that,
I was just looking as you go away,
Away from my sight, and my life,
I don’t want to say goodbye to you,
But that’s the last thing I did utter to you…

Maybe time did really do its task separating us,
So that we can see that we can go on,
Without each other, and live different lives,
And it will always be a memory,
A memory of our last farewell to each other...